Almost Done!

I packed and cleaned all day. Tomorrow I throw my final things (over night bag and purse) into my car, vacuum, and check out. Perhaps find a floor to crash on for my final night I HOPE to spend here, but I may end up spending in Bozo. Then I'm OFF!
I got my final eval yesterday. I'm competent. Means I can do my job but I'm not really good at it. Chef pointed out that I didn't exactly have the odds in my favor, jumping in mid season to a total mess like that being a first time manager and not having any training and such. D: But I'm confident I'll get the job back next summer. I told Chef I REALLY want to come back and try it again. She seemed optimistic about it.
I feel the need to say that I have Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog stuck in my head right now.
Meanwhile, back on the farm. I can't wait to get home. I know in a month I'll be restless again but I'm trying to take the initiative in my life, from this point on. (This point being earlier today when I made a very decisive move in my relationship-life) And from this point on I'm not going to wait. I get restless I'll go explore. I'm not going to give myself a REASON to be restless or bored or unhappy in any way again. And I'm not putting so much of my happiness into anyone else' hands that I cannot be happy regardless of what they do.
I'm stoked to start planning my road trip. SO MANY OPTIONS!! But I want it to be good, and I want it to take like, a month. I just need to plan and cost out and such. I saw a book on nothing but affordable diners drive ins and dives basically. I also want to look into the Diners Drive Ins And Dives thing. Maybe plan a road trip around that?
I want to get a GOOD camera for it. Get myself all ready. Yup yup. Stoked.
I guess nothing else to write about really. Life goes on. People do deserve second chances, especially since things can get misconstrued so easily. You shouldn't judge someone on what everyone else says, especially if 'everyone else' doesn't even actually know him. The rumor mill is an amazingly quick method of completely inaccurate news. And telling people of a rumor about you is the quickest way to put it to bed.
This summer I had the first rumor go around about me - ever that I can recall. And I was laughing my HEAD off! Told some of the guys who work for me about it, and one comes up to me later and sure as shit. Not ten minutes before I laughed about this rumor, the other guy standing there went up to him and said "You know what I heard about Cat?!" But it was put to bed quick by my laughing it off to them. Oh it was hilarious too.
Anyway. Signing off. Nothing to see here folks, keep it movin' along.

And this is how we avoid getting fired....

So there's this guy.
His name is James. He worked for the Inn EDR as a cook. God only knows the man probably couldn't make grilled cheese....Regardless.
They call him - or at least I do - Drunk James. And everyone, whether or not they call him that, know exactly who you're talking about. He's always drunk off his ass on beer and his damnable potato vodka.
He is the ONLY person I've found who can make me SO belligerent sober that I want to fight. He is the ONLY person I've found FOR SURE who can make me so belligerent drunk - I who am normally QUITE a happy drunk - that I pick fights with people. It's not pretty.
I'm sober right now. Have been all day. (Important as this story takes place today) He's not. He's drunk off his ass.
SO story begins approximately last week at the pub. I'm drinking but not really drunk. Buzzed maybe. He's totally drunk. I'm wearing pigtails. He comes up behind me and pulls on one of them. For everyone who knows me this next line will not be a surprise. I turned around and slapped him. Hard enough to get the point across, that's all. He got shocked asked why I told him not to pull my pigtails. Turned back to my beer. He got all pissy and pulled my pigtail again. So I turned around and slapped him again. He did it a third time, I slapped him a third time. For those who know me you already know if I have to slap someone in succession, it WILL get harder each time. And you WILL not like it. If memory serves, like usual when I'm around Drunk James, I left after I was done with my beer.
Not a half hour ago, I went to friends of mine's room down the hall. He was there. I always extract myself promptly when I see him. This time I didn't. Cuz I'm stupid. A few minutes later "oh Cat c'mere" I was already standing, he stands puts one hand around the back of my neck to hold me still and slaps me with the other. He's so damn drunk that it had no force and barely made it to my cheek - he practically slapped my neck. Then he sat down. I just grinned at him and said "you're really bad at that"
Well so I sat down and everything is going okay. Then a few minutes later he stands back up. "I remember now! You slapped me a couple times! Come here" and I stay sitting. He comes toward me and is practically towering over me while I'm sitting on the bed working on my stitching. He leans toward me and says come here again and I put down my stitching bring up defensive fists and say "why?"
He goes "you slapped me a couple times at the pub the other night!" I said "you pulled on my pigtails. If you had pigtails I'd pull on them and we'd be even." he starts in on "I'm a blackbelt! I'm going to teach you a lesson" while he's pointing at me, I'm still sitting with my fists up and stitching down.
The entire scenario - me down, him over me drunk pointing and "going to teach me a lesson" - I am pretty sure I coulda taken him, but it was scary and pissing me off all at once. And I was afraid he'd do something and I'd beat his ass and get fired. Cuz like HELL I was taking more than the one shot out of courtesy. When he slapped me the first time I ALMOST told him it was his ONE AND ONLY shot. I shoulda. Even right now I want to go back over there JUST to allow him to pick a fight with me. I'm not afraid of the fight. At all. ANyway. I said to him "You teach me a lesson every time I see you" and stood up with my stitching, turned to Laurie (who was watching it all with apprehension) and said "teaches me patience and self control. See you later" and walked out. She just grinned and let me go.
She understands. She doesn't like him - she puts up with him for Dano. She's wanted to smack the grin off his face too. And she's seen me around him. The comments more biting and less sarcastic and more serious and the grin on my face getting more evil and violent and the look on his face more belligerent and violent such.
Anyway. Here I sit now. That's the closest I've been to a real fight in a VERY long time. And the scary part was that I was NOT afraid. I was READY. And next time the man lays a hand on me, I will not take it out of courtesy for the drunk who thinks I deserve it.
Wish me luck that I don't see him again.

Plans

Okay,
So for all you who don't get it yet, Yellowstone is seasonal. Nature of the beast means if I'm not working winter (and I'm not) I've got six months to kill til April when I can come back. The options are daunting. For many there is literally nothing to go back to and they HAVE to find a winter job. For some the unemployment or travel or vacation on any level chance is exactly what they do. For some they do go home. Spend it with family or in an old job or both. For some they go to Hawaii (I hate you Eric and I hope you have a blast) You know what I'm saying. Options. Endless.
I have no clue what I'm going to do for the bulk of my winter. BUT whatever I do, I'm going to cut it short. I've been dying to do this for a few years now, so now tonight before all you on the other side of the computer screen I make the vow to go on a road trip at the end of the winter when things are turning warm again. Not sure yet where I'll go or what I'll do. But it'll start in Oregon, and end in Yellowstone. And I shall go. Yes. :D This is my vow to you and my promise to myself. I have five months to plan, so I'm sure I'll be okay, but this IS the plan!

Summers in the Stone....

So a friend of mine decided to give me a heart attack yesterday. I was eating dinner with him. Got up to go back to work. Not ten minutes later, a guy who works for me comes up out of breath telling me to call 911. There's a guy on the floor in the men's bathroom with a lot of blood coming out his head. So I do. When I get off I'm stressed and pissed that the guy on the other end is so damn calm - I know they train them like that but still! Apparently another guy called it in too, a guy with a cell AT the door to the bathroom. So I hang up and go in as I want to know if there's anything I can do and potentially who it is. Working EDR you see everyone. Well, under the stall wall, next to a quite sizable pool of blood is a very familiar arm in very familiar plaid. Cheryl and I at the same time cried out "It's JOSH!" and of course Josh has told me he suffers from epilepsy. Normally his seizures are so small that if you didn't know about them you wouldn't realize he'd just had one. I didn't until he pointed it out to me. Cheryl never knew at all. So I told the guy on the phone with 911. It was pertinent.
Emergency people arrive and I try to go back to work - nothing I can do anyhow. I'm stressed as hell all night and can barely sleep. I know they took him away in a stretcher but nothing else. I ask Avril - assistant location manager - to PLEASE let me know anything she hears. I also ask that of every security guard I know (since security and rangers use the same wave on the radio).
Today Location Manager Joe told me he'd been released and is on his way back home today. I saw him at dinner head firmly wrapped. Staples.... nine ish I think? Said he'd show me but he didn't want to remove the bandage. He was all good. Joking around as usual. We had to cancel our last-night-of-the-Bear-Pit date (last night the Inn's bar is open - Josh IS my drinking buddy after all). He promised to be up for a few beers after his staples were removed, so that's good. He's all casual and shit, I'm recovering from the heart attack he tried to give me.
Just another summer here in the Stone. One guy died about a week ago. Nice guy, knew him very briefly. Delivered something to the inn. Gas or something. Talked with him a few times last summer. Had a heart attack in his cab. Two - three? can't remember - bear attacks. Stupid tourists, I feel no sympathy. That's why you don't get between the cubs and the mom. That's why you turn back the FIRST time you see the bear, idiot!
A friend of mine actually accidentally HIT a bear with her car. Almost totaled the car, killed the bear. She did it by swerving to avoid hitting another bear. Crazy night on the road, I guess.
Yup. Just another summer in the Stone. Started snowing the other day, and now I've less than three weeks. I'm sooo ready to close this place down and head home, if only to visit.
Jackson Mountain Lodge and Spa haven't gotten back to me.
The other areas in Jackson do a job fair on November first. Chris tells me it's pretty simple and he's confident we'll both make it. I'm nervous about not having a FOR SURE job yet (which I coulda had if I'd stayed here and hadn't cared about actually BEING with Chris), and having no contact with Chris right now - for an unknown reason - is driving me literally mad.
Anyway. That's my rant and ramble. Things that frustrate me and such, I guess. Eh, life happens!

Wow has it been a while!

I don't know that I've posted since I've come to OF! I'm terribly sorry for the extraordinarily long gap in life!
So.... I got promoted from EDR cook at Canyon, now I'm EDR Manager at Old Faithful Snow Lodge. I am not just Cat - I am THE Cat damnit! I love my job. Although I didn't always. The first few weeks I came close to quitting a good number of times. I've managed to resolve myself to aspects I cannot change even though I'm not terribly fond of, and to the aspects that I will be able to change when I'm there from the start. That's terribly important to me right now, I feel that if I had been here from the start things would be much different. And since I WILL be here from the start next summer things will be different. Better.
Now I've almost got my crew trained as I want them. I'm gaining the confidence to confront the small problems in life. I'm gaining confidence in that I KNOW my job and I am - or will be - good at it. I don't think I'm overly arrogant, just confident enough to be worth something. The AM Sous Chef upstairs told me today that I've rocked it out while I've been here. Things have improved, and he's noticed. I don't technically need his approval, but from one who does not suck up and does not bullshit, who is very straightforward, I took it as high compliment.
Now, with the end of the season and the winding down, I'm facing new challenges I hadn't before. I'm glad for the preparation. I see this all as training. I try to see everything as training. Training for tomorrow, for next season, for my own diner. For everything. The first weeks - had I quit, I would never have had my diner. I would never have had the confidence that I could lead ANY amount of people even in my own place to have an effective establishment. I know I can cook, I know people LOVE my food. But I have never fully had confidence in my ability as a boss. Had I quit, what I had mustered would have been shattered. I would never have even tried for my diner. Now I know I can. I am fully confident in my capabilities. Now I need to master the business aspect of it - or get one hell of a partner. And of course the money.
Ah, I'm rambling aren't I?
Anyway, back to my EDR. Everyone's an EDR critic. I know I've a long way to go. And I know that I can get there. But everyone's a critic. I've dealt with a few idiots who don't know the first thing about food manage to bring down my food, my dining room, my kitchen, all of it. And I get to fight them back. It's kind of nice for me. We all know I've great loyalty issues - once I attach to a group or a place (and the EDR is MY baby!) I'm fiercely loyal, and now I can actually be the person on the front lines between my people and these idiots. I like it.
I know which opinions matter. And to an extent I'm forced to admit that everyone's does. As long as they're being reasonable and half way smart. That's a surprisingly small number. Surprisingly. Small. Just because it's not "like Moms" or you think "you could do better" - not a valid argument my friend.
I find it amazing that I am the one teaching the cook. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt I will never stop learning about food. That's one reason I LOVE cooking, you don't top out. But to be teaching others now? AMAZING. Kind of a confidence boost - that I'm trying not to let become arrogance - and kind of scary. People listening to me - luckily I'm right.
Oh - I've made bread and doughnuts. Doughnuts twice, Gram's mashed tato doughnuts. Everyone LOVES them! I times the recipe by six and make small doughnut holes, and they are gone in two hours flat! I set aside some if I want more than one or two as I'm frying. The bread I also timed by six. Also went with amazing speed. Shoot, the upstairs kitchen and my crew can eat half of either by themselves! It's very gratifying. My cook told me I could sell either. I told him one day I would.
I'm beginning to wonder about something though. I'm falling rather in love with baking and sweets - have been since this last winter (huh mom?)... I still love to cook, but coffee shop or bakery instead of diner? Probably not. But baked goods for SURE in my diner! I love playing in patisserie stuff. :D
Anyway. I'm half expecting a few guys over to watch Ferngully - neither have seen it and that's JUST sad! I was to help provide beer but I got to the gen store after it closed. Ah well.
I think that's life right now.... Fairly caught up. I'll try to add more soon.
Signing off,